Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I actually pay taxes

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Is it true that all men want a woman who looks like an Instagram “model”?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I see through liars

What is the reasoning behind conspiracy theorists claiming that there were multiple shooters involved in the JFK assassination?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Why have cell phones, the internet, and reality TV turned the world into a toilet, as this has not advanced us in any way?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

What I have noticed is nearly every girl I try to connect with whom reject me are in their early 20s why is that the case?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Have you ever dealt with a Christian narcissist?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know who the president of Turkey really is

If you could go back and rewrite the Legend of Korra, what would you change, and why?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t cotton to rapists

What's your take on Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? How has it affected you?

I have a reading level above third grade

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

What happened to your school bully?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

‘It Is Going to Happen’: JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon Warns of Crack in the Bond Market - Barron's

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have complete contempt for fakery

Astronomers Just Discovered The Biggest Explosions Since The Big Bang - ScienceAlert

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Why do people turn a blind eye to bad behaviour if someone is very good looking? Whereas if someone is ugly, they get harshly judged for everything?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Why am I peeing so much without drinking a lot of water? I checked my blood sugar and it is normal. Could it be something else?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I can read

What are Best Breakfast Places in Pune?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Do all therapists specialize in one specific type of therapy, or are they trained in multiple types?

I don’t buy bullshit

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

French Open: No. 1 Aryna Sabalenka ends Swiatek's reign and meets No. 2 Coco Gauff for the trophy - AP News

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I can count

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand how hurricane paths work